Christopher Bendini

Christopher Benidini is a rat fuck who owes a lot of people a lot of fucking money. And don't think i'm joking when I say a lot of people, this piece of garbage shit stain is in the pocket of every single crime family from Brisbane to fuckin' Naples. Christopher is a sad, pathetic, alcoholic waste of skin who tastes any job he can get his filthy fuckin' mitts on. First time people saw his stupid head in Australia was Episode 1 of Season 1 and ever since hes been popping up fucking everywhere all over the timelines. Didn't take long for us to realise this scumbag is relevant to the whole multiverse and hes in EVERY SINGLE ONE of them. There's no escaping the little bitch of a man.

This also goes without saying but, if you or a loved one have ever been scammed by Christopher Bendini please let your local authorities know as soon as possible, so that they can redirect the information to your local crime syndicate. Do anything you can to make sure this little pig gets all his limbs removed, and all his organs scattered in a field somewhere desolate.

This stupid fuck dreams of one day doing stand up at The Tivoli in Brisbane, having been told its THE place to be for stand up comedians. Not once has he even googled it to see if they host stand up comedians or anything of the like (which they do rarely).

It would be easier if this page didn't even need to exist but unfortunately it does because the rat fuck just will not go away.

Appearance
Christopher Bendini is 6'0, with dirty (and I mean dirty) blond hair. Hes usually very drunk, tired or filthy, more often than not he'll smell of something strong or something disgusting. Bendini can also be found wearing his trademark Punisher shirt and gray suit jacket, a combination which everyone agrees is just awful.

People Christopher Owes Money To

 * John Travolta
 * U1
 * Tony Abbott
 * Cosa Nostra
 * Henry VIII
 * Lachlan
 * Me and also by extension my mother
 * The artist formerly known as Prince
 * 50 Cent
 * Lisa Janti
 * Jacob Schiff
 * Simon Cowell
 * World Wrestling Entertainment, Inc.
 * John Madden
 * Barack Obama
 * Dave
 * Ian Kilmister
 * Sonny Moore
 * Robin Williams as The Genie

Trivia

 * Christopher is 43.
 * The Queen of England is said to have made love to Christopher Bendini on a dare.
 * Christopher has a diet made up exclusively of burnt toast and liquor.
 * Christopher has 13 children, none of which he has met.
 * There is no known universe where Christopher is not a piece of shit.
 * Christopher is considered a demigod.